I met up with a newfound friend over Christmas, had a lovely lunch and we introduced our babies to one another. One of the things we spoke about and she said, stuck with me. She basically said that with her having a second child she now dares to trust her instincts rather than follow what one ‘should’ do when having a baby. A lot of first time moms follow advice out of fear and lack of experience, which is absolutely fine. I did it. But with Leo growing into his own unique little person I will dare, not only for me, but for him. To trust that my mama-instincts will pick up on his needs and wants.
There have been many times where I have made a choice and it has been questioned. By books, websites, strangers, friends or even family. Simple things like how, when and where he sleeps at night. How I go about his daytime naps, how often I feed, how I deal with his cries – too quickly or slow. Or bigger things such as when and how to give his vaccinations. Everyone has an opinion. But that’s just it, it is everyone else’s, not mine. Sure, certain things I want to discuss and I ask for opinions, and that is how an opinion should be shared.
I’m proud of how much I’ve followed my instincts. I wrote about sleep a while back and how much people want to influence MY and MY BABY’s routines. Just stop it, everyone stop. I’ll ask if I want your opinion.
With each day as a mother I grow more confident and I feel like people’s comments now are like raindrops and I’m wearing a raincoat. It feels good, to trust myself.
This is not something that is linked to motherhood only, but life. It is not only about daring to trust your instincts about your baby, but daring to trust yourself, as a mother but also as your own person. Make choices that will make you happy, not everyone else. I have always been good at being happy. But this year I will work even harder on that. I will work on keeping my baby happy too, and I know that Matthew and I know him better than anyone else, and we will make choices that make our family happy.